sport and fitness, silhouette of woman meditating on the beach

This week, I’ve found it more difficult to not sneak a peek at the full body mirror. I think in some ways I’m a tad paranoid that not watching is going to have the opposite impact of my goal. Last night, I was feeling particularly curious and I almost looked for just a second because I had a fleeting thought wondering if I looked fat. This thought stemmed from feeling heavier yesterday than I have felt in a while.

Recently, I have begun feeling THIN. I don’t know how I look but I felt thin. Of course, thin is a relative term. Feeling thin and being thin are also two different things. Me feeling thin might be a similar feeling to someone who actually is. It’s not about the way you look, it’s a feeling which is what this is all about. Every female I know has fat and skinny days. To have a fat day, you feel bloated and perhaps lethargic. You don’t necessarily feel good in your clothes and are blah. To feel skinny though, that’s exciting. You have more energy, you look good in an outfit, and you feel good. Anyone can have a skinny day, regardless of size.

So, every day for the past couple of weeks has been a skinny day. Putting hands on my waist made me feel tiny and I could feel my progress. That is, until yesterday.

I had no energy and felt bloated. That has continued on into today. That wonderful feeling of thin I had been accumulated dissipated as if it never were. The past two days made me realize how far I had come in regards to my efforts. I was really beginning to appreciate my body, enjoying the curves, and having more energy. For me to be so tired early and not have the willpower to go on my nightly walk, it’s like I didn’t know myself. Now, I’ve felt this way in the past and usually after sleep I’m back to normal.

Unfortunately, I’m still feeling off. I am glad to be paying more attention to body these days because in the past, that might be something shrug off. Instead of letting an unfortunate feeling linger, I’m going to take note of anything different. The only thing that has changed is I’ve been drinking Lipton’s Diet Citrus Green Tea everyday. This is something I used to drink all the time because I love tea and this has no sugar. I have issues with sugar so maybe the aspartame is a problem. I’m in experimental phase so I really don’t know, that’s the only thing that comes to mind in terms of changes.

So, today I’m going to drink the tea (since I had already started) and tomorrow I’m not. Perhaps Friday I’ll have learned something. I’m also going to actively get more water in. I have substituted tea for water which might also be attributing to the issue. Although, I should add that I’m not a big water drinker anyway which also might make it worse. I drink at least 24oz of water a day but haven’t been in the past few days. The goal for today is to drink the tea with water then tomorrow drink only the water and see how I feel Friday.

Hopefully next time I update I’ll be back to feeling thin! I technically have less than a week left before #1MonthNoMirrors is completed. I want to feel better before that happens. 🙂

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